The New World Library

From my favorite seat at the Satan George branch of the Washington County Library I can monitor the progress of the construction of the new library building. It’s going very slow.

I have often thought about how slow construction projects in Satan George are. It is unbelievable compared to the speed of similar projects farther up north. It would appear, that without the threat of a severe winter, construction companies have the luxury to take their sweet time. This is great for those workers who get paid by the hour. I cannot, however, see the benefit to the contractor though, who gets paid by the job. Even road construction in this town is a joke. The boulevard project should have been finished months ago.

Additional problems are also evident with the new library building. For starters, it’s small. Granted, Washington county does not have enough books to fill the current libraries; a new larger building is not even needed. Still, if your going to build one, why not take the initiative and build it with the future in mind. Looking at this new building, I cannot believe that the floor space any greater than the current library.

Too make matters even worse, is the actual floor plan. I have never seen the design or the specs, but I can tell you there are a lot of interior walls. I cannot, for the life of me, think of a reasonable explanation for the placement of the walls I have seen being erected these past few weeks. Do they plan to have different smaller rooms for the various categories, or sections? I have no doubt they are planning a major segregation of the patrons.

The librarians here seem to think their authority extends over the people as well as the books. A quick look at the current building will reveal no less than a dozen video surveillance camera’s. Have you ever been in a public library with a single camera? Neither had I until coming to the socialist state of Utah. Try answering your cellphone here, you’ll discover a belligerent attack by the Washington County Library Nazi Police. The ACLU would have a field day with the number of rights violations you can expect to experience here every day.

Some of my expectations for the new the library, if they ever get it built, include: no bike rack, if you’re unwilling/able to drive a car, they won’t want you there; no backpacks allowed, that’s Utah’s-bankrupt capitol of the world-discrete way of saying no homeless; no laptops, you’ll have to pay to utilize the computers in the new claustrophobic computer lab, but you can only view pre-approved webpages and suffer enormous lag time due to the extreme filtering processes; cell access hindering paint; no children allowed, they already try to ‘enforce’ that rule here; separate, uncomfortable seating in other claustrophobic chambers for those who refuse to leave the library to read; and the same Nazi staff just to name a few. Sound dismal? It is, but it is also realistic, most of them are already implemented to some extent.

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